


Bittersweet jealousy

by Bokuroyaoya



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Drama & Romance, Fluff, Jealousy, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-23
Updated: 2020-03-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:35:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22864918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bokuroyaoya/pseuds/Bokuroyaoya
Summary: Many people claim that long-distance relationships aren't meant to work out. Is it true what they say? Is it impossible to maintain a relationship when you're hardly able to see each other that often? Tsukishima isn't quite sure about that anymore since a weirdly mixed up chaos of feelings drives him crazy. Will their bond be strong enough to survive?
Relationships: Bokuto Koutarou/Kuroo Tetsurou, Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei
Comments: 2
Kudos: 43





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to write something for one of my favorite ships Kurotsuki. (with smalls hints of my all time favorite ship Bokuroo ;I)  
> It's nothing special, however, I hope you like it and have fun reading it :)

"And then you just broke up with him?" – "It was no easy decision for me, you know... he hasn't contacted me for ages, and when I finally got hold of him, I heard a woman's voice in the background that was definitely not his sister's!" – "Oh, dear, that sounds terrible... Seems like it's true what people say about long-distance relationships. They are doomed to fall apart sooner or later. You only saw each other for one weekend every few months. He must have been frustrated."- "Yeah, probably. But that doesn't give him the right to cheat! Don't you think that goes too far?"

Tsukishima let out an annoyed sigh before getting up from his seat and putting on his headphones. He just couldn't take the senseless gibberish of his annoying classmates anymore. He didn't want to hear all of that. Thus, he smothered the girls' cackling with his music and headed for one of the vending machines with his hands in his pockets and an annoyed look on his face. There, he saw another problem that he really didn't want to worry about now. Hinata.

"Out of the frying pan and into the fire…" he mumbled quietly to himself and brushed the headphones off his head so that they could hang around his shoulders. "What are you doing?", he asked annoyed, but secretly hoped he wouldn't get an answer since he didn't really care what the boy was doing. But Hinata wouldn't be Hinata if he didn't start babbling like crazy: "Kageyama was mad because I brought him the wrong drink. Now I'm trying to figure out what to get him. He always prefers to drink his strawberry milk, but it's been out since yesterday. So, I brought him chocolate milk, but he says it tastes too bitter. Tsukishima, you know what-"Hinata couldn't go on with his question since Tsukishima had long since turned and moved away from the boy. He only heard Hinata shouting after him loudly and angrily. However, Tsukishima didn't care. As if he would like to take care of the two love idiots. What did it matter to him, what Hinata should or shouldn't get Kageyama to drink?

"Ridiculous", he snorted softly, shaking his head. When he got to the next vending machine, he bought a cold green tea bottle and went back to the classroom drinking it. With another sigh, he sat back down in the hope that his classmates had finally stopped chattering.

To his relief, they actually did. Or rather, they had changed places so that he could no longer hear them and, above all, had to.  
Ten minutes until the break ended, and the next lesson would begin. He sipped his tea as he glanced at his cell phone—a new message from Kuroo.

_> Hey, Tsukki! I just thought that I haven't heard your voice in a very long time. Call again soon! Love, Kuroo <3<_

His eyebrows contracted, and he let an annoyed "tch" escape his lips. "Then just call me yourself if you really want to hear my voice, you stupid idiot cat." He winced when he suddenly saw Yamaguchi standing in front of him. "Everything okay, Tsukki? You spoke to yourself and somehow looked... angry?" Yamaguchi was visibly confused and worried at the same time. "No, all well", answered the blonde, sighing again. How many times had he sighed today? He wondered whether the people around him noticed it. Even if they did, they probably didn't care since they were used to him being in a bad mood anyway.

The rest of the school day was quiet, and even the training was exceptionally more relaxed than usual. Kageyama and Hinata kept shouting insults at their heads as usual. Still, otherwise, there were hardly any difficulties or situations that would have annoyed Tsukishima even more. Maybe it was because they had won their most important game last week and now had a month's rest until the next match. After a victory and a long break until the next big event, it was clearly felt how the individual members' tension went down, and everyone calmed down a bit. All except Hinata and Kageyama, of course.  
When the training was over, and Tsukishima had changed, Yamaguchi tapped him on the shoulder from behind and grinned at him. "Fancy an ice cream?"

But the blonde shook his head slightly as a response. "I'm sorry, Yamaguchi, unfortunately, I don't have time today. Got something to do. Tomorrow maybe." He raised his hand to say goodbye and left the locker room without saying anything more. He just left a sad, sulking Yamaguchi.

On the way home, he reread the message Kuroo had sent him. "Call again soon", he murmured, unable to suppress another sigh. Without thinking about it, he dialed Kuroo's number. He listened to the sharp beep until the "click" finally sounded, followed by a voice he knew so well. "Tsukki? Tsukki, is it really you?" came the surprising question at the end of the line. "What a stupid question, of course, I am.." he was interrupted. "Tsukki! Hey, hey hey, Tsukki! How are you? Hard at training?"

Tsukishima's eyes widened when he realized whose voice he was hearing. "Bokuto? Is Bokuto with you?" – "Yes, I'm sorry, he just shouted into my cell phone. Excuse me for a moment ... Bo, shut up, please! He called me, do you hear?! Me! Not you! So, stay out of it, you stupid owl! ... Well, now I'm back, Tsukki, what's up? Why are you calling me out of the blue? "

Tsukishima felt anger boiling up inside him, but he couldn't match that feeling. He didn't exactly know why he was suddenly so angry. "What's up?! Why am I calling out of the blue?! You were the one who wanted to hear my voice! You wrote that I should call you again!" He snorted with a snappy undertone.

Silence.

"Kuroo? Why aren't you answering?"

He could literally hear Kuroo grinning up and down when he finally said his answer: "I didn't think you would take it so seriously ... honestly, Bo got me to write this to you. He wanted to know how you would react to it if I.."

"So Bokuto, mh. Are you hanging out all day today? Oh, you know what, I don't really care. If that was just a joke, I can hang up now. Have fun, both of you. Bye."

"STOP! Wait, Tsu.."

Beep. Beep. Beep.

Angry, Tsukishima clenched his free hand into a fist while holding his cell phone in the other. He gritted his teeth and trembled slightly. "I'm such an idiot!" he said to himself and angrily put the cell phone in the pocket of his jacket. He still couldn't tell exactly what it was that made him so angry.

He felt his cell phone vibrate in his pocket but decided to ignore it. It was definitely just Kuroo who called back to apologize. However, he didn't feel like it at the time. He just wanted to go home and take a bath.

With his eyes closed, he enjoyed the warmth that enveloped his body. The hot steam enveloped his face. For the first time that day, he felt really relaxed and almost happy.

As he lay in the bathtub and relaxed, his thoughts suddenly drifted back to his classmates' conversation. 'And when I finally got hold of him, I heard a woman's voice', the girl's words echoed in his head. 'Long-distance relationships have no future.'

Annoyed and angry at the same time, he dipped his head underwater and screamed. He screamed as loud as he could, but the scream was suppressed by the water. When he reappeared, he breathed heavily and coughed slightly. He was mad at himself for going crazy with these thoughts. Because he let the stupid girls' words come too close to him. He was probably angry with himself because he was angry with Kuroo. Kuroo hadn't done anything after all. At least he hadn't done anything that Tsukishima could prove.

"Kei? Are you all right? You've been in the bathroom for over an hour now ... If you don't come out soon, you'll catch a cold", he heard his brother's concerned voice, knocking on the door. "Yes, I'm sorry, Aki ... I just dozed off a little. I'll dry myself straight away and do my homework", he replied promptly.

However, of course, homework was out of the question. He was too upset, and his thoughts were everywhere except where they should be. Thus, he lay down on his bed and listened to music. His music always managed to relax him and to change his mind. He didn't want to ponder now. Neither the words of the girls nor Kuroo and Bokuto. He just wanted to lie here and forget. Immerse himself in another world that belonged only to him and the band he listened to.

When Tsukishima woke up the next morning, his head pounded. Only with great effort did he manage to open his eyes. However, he had to squeeze them straight back because the light that shone through his window made it even more painful for him. A painful groan escaped his throat. He had actually caught a cold yesterday in the bathroom.

Shortly after realizing this, there was a knock on his door. "Kei, hurry up, you'll be late for school otherwise!" It was Akiteru's voice calling out to him.

"I'm sick", he croaked and was startled by the fragility of his voice. At that moment, the door was opened, and a concerned Akiteru stood in his room. "Did you catch a cold, my dear brother? I knew that would happen because you had been bathing for hours!" Tsukishima squeaked in a low voice: "Don't be so loud, damn it, my head hurts."

"I am sorry! Just stay in your bed, Kei! I will tell mom to report you sick, and I will cook you a nice warm soup and get medication from the pharmacy. Just try to get some sleep. Do you have a fever?"  
When his brother finally left the room to put his words into action, Tsukishima narrowed his eyes and massaged his temples. His fingers felt freezing on his hot forehead. He actually had a fever.

"Ridiculous", he snorted, "I'm such a fool."

Shortly afterward, he fell asleep again despite the severe headache and sore throat. He slept through the entire morning.


	2. Chapter 2

When Tsukishima opened his eyes again in the early afternoon, he felt a little better. His head was still pounding, and he still had a fever. However, he didn't feel as miserable as it did in the morning. When he looked at his bedside table, he recognized a white bag and a note.

"I didn't want to wake you up, Kei. Here are medicines for fever and cold symptoms. It's best to take it as soon as you're awake", he read the message. He had to admit that he had the best brother anybody could ask for. No matter what Tsukishima did or didn't do, Akiteru would always stand behind him and support him in everything.

Additionally, when he was sick, his brother looked after him so lovingly. Sometimes he felt terrible that he was often so dismissive and cold to him. But that was just his way. He couldn't do much about it whether he wanted to or not.

Without wasting any more time, he took the medication out of the bag and immediately took it with three sips of water. Now all he had to do was hope that the pills would work as quickly as possible.  
In the meantime, he let himself fall back into his pillow and wandered again with his thoughts.

When he thought about it that way, Bokuto and Kuroo were always hanging out with each other. They spent a lot of time together. That has always been the case. Even at the training camp back then, the two were only ever seen together. Except, of course, on this one evening when Kuroo...

Tsukishima shook his head, which he immediately regretted because it made it even more painful for him. "Why do I have to think of this evening right now?" he snapped softly into his pillow.  
It was the fourth and last evening of the training camp in Tokyo. Exhausted from the training, everyone treated themselves to a nice hot bath. Everyone except Tsukishima. He had gotten a warm green tea from a vending machine and sat down on a park bench with his headphones on to enjoy the cool evening air and watch the stars. It was the first time in these four days that he was calm, and there were no screaming men around him.

When they didn't have a training match, he trained with Kuroo, Bokuto, and Akaashi. At some point, Hinata and Lev came in for training as well. It was as if they wanted to test all of Tsukishima's patience. The only one who seemed calm and relaxed and didn't get on his nerves consistently was Akaashi. He had enough problems with his idiot of a captain.

While listening to his favorite music, he closed his eyes and tapped his fingers on the park bench in the melody's tact.

He didn't know how long he had been sitting there because he was so absorbed in his own world. He was also unaware that he was being watched until he felt that someone was sitting next to him. Startled, he winced and opened his eyes. At first, he had suspected Yamaguchi was worried about him not being in the bath with the others. However, he was wrong. It was Kuroo.  
Tsukishima's heart immediately started pounding and his face twisted into a confused expression. He couldn't put his heart pounding. After all, he hadn't been thus terrified.

"May I?", Kuroo finally broke the silence and pointed to the headphones that Tsukishima was holding in his hand. The latter was still visibly irritated by the whole situation so that he was unable to answer immediately. Kuroo just grinned and grabbed the headphones. He held it against one of his ears and listened carefully to the music. He also closed his eyes and rocked slightly with one leg.

This sight strangely fascinated Tsukishima so that he couldn't take his eyes off the black-haired one. It was almost magical how he sat in front of him, illuminated by the glittering moonlight and the flickering light of the streetlamp a few meters away. While he hummed the tune quietly, he smiled. It wasn't his typical malicious or sarcastic grin. It was a sincere, beautiful smile.

It must have been the first time Tsukishima had hoped that a moment would last forever.

Startled by his own thoughts, he cleared his throat loudly and adjusted his glasses. Luckily, it was so dark outside that hopefully, the other one couldn't see how red his face had turned.  
Kuroo opened his eyes again and looked at the blonde. "Oh, I'm sorry", he laughed. "I guess I got carried away too much. You have good taste in music."

"Thank you", Tsukishima murmured softly, picking up the headphones again. "But what do you actually want here? All alone?" he then wanted to know.

Kuroo rested his arms on the park bench and stretched out his legs. "You know, I was just about to get something to drink from the vending machine when I looked out the window and saw you sitting here all by yourself. And well..." With every other word he spoke, he looked a little more nervous. The imaginary and always the sarcastic captain of the Nekoma team was not used to that. The blonde was even more astonished. However, he decided to continue listening to the black-haired man's words.

"Somehow ... we never have the opportunity to speak privately... well, that's how it is when you're at a training camp, I suppose. There are always so many people around, and it is difficult with Bokuto and Lev in particular, but you know that yourself." He interrupted his own words with a nervous laugh.

All this nervousness also made Tsukishima very nervous, and he could not assign the feelings that were boiling in him. He had rarely felt so strange, uncomfortable, and happy at the same time. What was that strange situation here? He wanted to get up and just walk away, but some force that seemed to be heavier than gravity kept him seated on the park bench. It was hardly possible for him to move.  
"Tell me, Tsukki, what do you think about…" He stopped in the middle of his sentence and swallowed. He looked uncertainly at the blonde and tried to keep his smile, which he managed only moderately. Thus, he quickly looked up at the sky and sighed. "Beautiful starry sky, huh?"

"Okay, what kind of game is actually going on here?" Tsukishima finally broke the strange mood and looked confused and somewhat angry at the same time. "This doesn't look like you at all. I do not understand you. I don't understand what you want here and what you want to tell me with all of this. I certainly don't understand. What is your problem?"

Kuroo's eyes widened in surprise. He probably hadn't expected such a reaction. But after the brief surprise stare, he caught himself pretty quickly and managed to put on his usual smile. "You're right. It doesn't look like me."

He turned to Tsukishima and moved closer to him so that he could look him better in the eyes. The latter wanted to move backward out of reflex, but that was not possible since Kuroo was already holding his arms. "It really doesn't look like me", he whispered again, coming closer and closer to Tsukishima's face. The blonde was in shock and didn't know what was happening here. His heart started pounding more and more, the closer his face came to him. He was afraid his heart would explode if it beat even faster.

"You must have driven me crazy, Tsukki", Kuroo breathed against his lips as he slowly closed his eyes and gave him a kiss. Tsukishima's eyes widened. Was he just kissed? From Kuroo? From THE Kuroo?  
A part of him wanted to push him away, shout at him, and run away as quickly as possible. However, another part of him - and that was definitely the more vital part at that moment - wanted to return the kiss and tightly hug the black-haired. That's precisely what he did.

He put his arms around Kuroo, pressed him closer, and returned the kiss.

Now it was the black-haired man who opened his eyes in confusion. However, he closed it immediately and grinned into the kiss. He seemed happy. And Tsukishima? He was both pleased and confused. That warm feeling in him ... did that mean he was in love? The goosebumps that spread over his entire body, the almost painful palpitations that grew stronger ... were these signs that should prove he actually was in love?

Tsukishima was so absorbed in his thoughts - or instead, he was absorbed in ordering his thoughts - that he never noticed how Kuroo had also wrapped his arms around him and held him tight.  
He had lost all his sense of time, so he didn't really know how long they had kissed. After releasing the kiss, they were still holding each other in the arms. Kuroo buried his head in Tsukishima's shoulder and laughed softly.

"I love you, Tsukki", he mumbled so quietly that it was hard to understand. However, Tsukishima understood every word as if it had been shouted in his ear. He immediately blushed and gritted his teeth, less with anger than with ineptitude.

The next day, the Karasuno team went home immediately after breakfast.

All bags were already loaded on the bus, and Ukai counted those present while Takeda was already sitting in the driver's seat. He was even buckled up and just waiting for all the students to get on the bus.

Tsukishima was about to get on the bus as well until he was stopped by a voice. "Tsukki! Wait, Tsukki!" It was Kuroo's voice calling out to him. Thinking of the previous evening, the blonde blushed a little red and let out an annoyed "tch". With a sigh, he turned and saw the black-haired man running out of breath.

"Tsukki, I... I have to tell you something important before you go." With these words, he came very close and whispered in his ear. Thus, no one else would hear what he had to say. "I mean, what I said yesterday really seriously. I love you, Tsukki. It's okay if you can't give me an answer right away, but... please think about it thoroughly at home and call me."

Yamaguchi, Hinata, and Kegayama stood not far from the two and watched the spectacle with raised eyebrows. "What does that mean?" Hinata asked the group. "He must have told him something like: 'We've been training together for the past four days, but don't think I'll take your feelings into consideration when we face each other in a match,'" Kageyama replied, shrugging his shoulders. "Do you think so? You are probably right", Hinata murmured more to himself than to his partner and shrugged his shoulders as well. "Why does he call him 'Tsukki', though?" muttered Yamaguchi through gritted teeth.

When they were on the bus and on their way home, Tsukishima looked out the window listening to music. What exactly was love? He had never really dealt with it. He had never really thought about it either. Of course, he has received confessions from girls many times, but he has refused them since he did not want to waste time and effort on such annoying creatures. The girls he knew weren't his type at all. They only had boys, make-up, and pretty singers and actors in their heads. It was always about the same topic. They laughed too shrill and too loud and were generally just annoying. He could never understand when his classmates said a girl was cute. After all, he had never thought of a girl as cute.

What about Kuroo? What did he think about Kuroo? So far, he hadn't given much thought to that. Kuroo was just Kuroo. He was someone he liked to train with and who could give him useful tips for blocking. So far, he always thought that he neither liked him nor particularly despised him. His feelings for him were just average. He was neither a friend nor an enemy to him. However, if he thought about it... was that really all?

His thoughts drifted back to the kiss. He liked the kiss. It triggered feelings of happiness in him that he did not know before. When he thought back on it, he could still feel the warmth on his lips.  
Maybe it was really love?

Tsukishima woke up drenched in sweat, and he breathed heavily. "A dream?" he murmured quietly, looking around. He was in his room. Of course, after all, he was sick. "Why do I have to dream about that now of all times?"

He sighed. That evening had been half a year ago, and it was only two weeks before he decided he wanted to try it. He wanted to get to the bottom of the feelings he felt when they kissed and learn more. Thus, it happened that he and Kuroo had been a couple for almost half a year now.

Of course, his teammates didn't know about it, and if he was honest, it didn't feel like a real relationship. Not that he had a clue of relationships, it was his first after all, but somehow, he always thought of it differently. Of course, this may be primarily due to the fact that they had a long-distance relationship. After all, Kuroo lived in Tokyo, and he in Sendai. He had to travel by train for almost three hours to be with him. With school and volleyball training, dates were out of the question.

They saw each other every few weekends and every now and then during the holidays.

Actually, Tsukishima thought he wouldn't mind if they didn't see each other that often. He thought Kuroo would have a lot more problems with this than he did. Apparently, the opposite was the case. He was driving himself crazy because he didn't know what Kuroo was doing and thinking, while Kuroo was having fun with Bokuto in the meantime and didn't really care what Tsukishima was doing or how he was doing.

Tsukishima sighed heavily. When he was sick at home, he had far too much time to sink into his sea of thoughts. He just wanted to be left alone. All this chaos of love didn't suit him. He tried to forget it all. The evening, the kiss, the warmth, this feeling of happiness. He didn't want to know any more about all of this.

"I hate Kuroo!"


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading my story! I hope you liked it and if you want I'd appreciate it if you could leave a little comment telling me how you liked my writing ^w^

By late evening Tsukishima was finally able to get out of his bed thanks to the medication that had worked quickly and well. In the meantime, Akiteru had prepared a soup for him. Thus, he would at least eat a little something. He also had freshly cut apples and brought a pudding.

After stretching extensively, he slowly got up and looked around his room briefly. At that moment, he was surprised to find that he hadn't even looked at his cell phone today. He must have had a lot of worried messages from his team members. Most certainly, he would read a lot of scolding from Yamaguchi in particular.

Annoyed, he reached for his cell phone. He didn't really want to look at it, but somehow, he felt obliged to. Of course, it came as he thought it would. Most of the emails were from Yamaguchi, who wanted to know what was going on and whether he would eat properly. Even Hinata had written him a worried message and wished him well.  
A slight smile crept onto his lips. However, that smile evaporated immediately when he saw that he had twenty missed calls from Kuroo.  
Just when he thought he would check his mailbox whether Kuroo might have left a message, the cell phone in his hand started to vibrate.

"Speaking of the devil", he murmured, annoyed, and sighed.

For a moment, he considered whether he should really take the call or not, however, decided very quickly to do so. After all, he couldn't just be so mad at his boyfriend without actually telling him what he had done wrong. Besides, Kuroo hadn't even actively done anything wrong. It wasn't his fault, after all, that Tsukishima worried so much unnecessarily.

"Hello, Ku…" he couldn't even finish his sentence since he was interrupted by a relieved cry. "TSUKKI! Finally, you pick up the phone! It felt like I was trying to reach you forever, but you just didn't answer. I was so worried, you can't imagine it." His voice was filled with concern and relief at the same time.

Tsukishima's heart pounded when he heard his boyfriend's voice and smiled. It was almost as if all the anger he had a few moments ago was gone. "I'm sorry, Kuroo. I am sick and slept almost all day today."

"You're sick? Is it serious? Did you take medication? Have you eaten? I hope you have a good diet so that you can get well soon! Should I come over and take good care of you…"

"Hey, take it easy now. After all, I am no longer a small child. I only have a little fever and a headache. Everything's half as bad, so don't worry too much. I'm sure tomorrow I'll be fine, and I can go to training again." There was a short silence between them before Kuroo started to speak again: "I'm glad it's nothing serious." He cleared his throat briefly. "So ... Tsukki, listen, because of yesterday..." – "It's okay, Kuroo. You do not have to apologize. After all, you didn't do anything wrong. I just overreacted. Yesterday was a stressful day for me."

"Phew, I'm glad you're not angry anymore, Tsukki. That bothered me all night yesterday." – "Oh yes, you can't imagine, Tsukki! He drank Coke with me all evening and whined like a little baby! You should have seen that, Tsukki! It was kind of pathetic."

Tsukishima raised his eyebrows. Again, it was Bokuto's voice that came from the background. "Stop it with your nonsense, Bo! Don't listen to him, Tsukki! He's just talking nonsense again, you know… like he always does."

"So, you spent the whole last night with Bokuto?" the blonde groaned, unable to suppress the angry undertone in his voice. He didn't want to hide it either. Kuroo was allowed to know that he was angry. This time he even had a reason. At least he thought it was a reasonable enough reason to be angry.

"Tsukki? Are you angry? I told you not to listen to what Bokuto says. He always talks too much when the day is long,", Kuroo laughed nervously.

"That's not the point, idiot! You are constantly connected with your so-called 'Bo'. Bokuto here, Bokuto there, Bokuto everywhere. What do you actually do all the time when you are together, huh?" – "Tsukki?" – "You must definitely be frustrated since we hardly see each other, and you are probably fed up with me, aren't you? That's why you prefer to have fun with Bokuto. Why don't you just tell me? Are you afraid of hurting me? Don't worry about it. After all, you're not that important to me!" – "TSUKKI?!" – "Actually, I didn't want to be with you at all. You pushed me into a relationship with you, and I thought, why not even try. Now, look at you. Now that you've found a replacement for me, you probably don't need me—"

"TSUKKI! Now listen to me! What ... what are you talking about?" Kuroo finally interrupted him successfully. His voice trembled, and he seemed shocked. "What do you mean I would have fun with Bokuto? Are you jealous? Of Bokuto?"

Tsukishima's face went bright red. On the one hand, with shame, on the other hand, with anger. The anger continued to boil in him. He didn't even recognize himself like that anymore and wished for it to stop. He wished he could react as indifferently and bored as ever. He didn't want to be angry and indeed not jealous.

"Tsukki, why don't you say anything?", Kuroo's voice was incredibly desperate. "Did you mean that when you said you didn't care about me? Hey, please answer me, Tsukki! Nothing is going on with Bokuto! And I don't see him as a replacement for you either! He is my best friend and..."

"Just stop talking, Kuroo. I don't want to hear your excuses anymore. I do not care. My head hurts, and I'm just angry. Since we've been together and even that evening when you confessed your love to me... You just cause chaos of feelings in me that I don't want to worry about. I don't want any of this anymore. This long-distance relationship never was a good idea, and we should just end it already."  
"Are you serious?! You want to break up with me here and now on a phone call?" The black-haired sounded like he was sobbing.

Tsukishima became dizzy. Everything turned around, and he could still hear Kuroo's voice. However, he could no longer comprehend any words. The desperate sobs echoed in his head, and he felt boiling. He had to support himself with his free hand because he thought he was losing grip.

It must have been the fever. The fact that he was so upset made it worse and now threatened to make him faint.

The next moment he hit the floor with a loud bang and dropped the cell phone, which also landed next to him with another bang.

“Tsukki? Tsukki, can you hear me?! TSUKKI?!”

A dull voice came into his ears. "Kei?" It was his name. It was probably Akiteru's voice. He would have liked to open his eyes to make sure, but his eyelids felt so heavy. His whole body felt like lead. Thus, he couldn't move an inch. The floor under him was hard, which had to mean he wasn't in his bed. Why did he lie here? He couldn't remember falling asleep.

"Hot", he croaked. "Kei?! Are you conscious?" The voice became clearer and more apparent. Now he could say with certainty that it was his brother.

"Tsukki! Hey, Tsukki!" Another voice entered his head. Whose voice was that? It seemed so familiar to him, and yet he couldn't assign it.

Ice-cold hands reached for his body and lifted him off the floor. The next thing he felt was a soft pillow and a soft blanket on which he was placed.

The voices grew quieter again. However, they were still there. Two voices, his brother and ...? How he would have loved to open his eyes to see who was there with him. However, he simply lacked any strength.

It must have been at least two hours before Tsukishima finally regained consciousness and could blink open his eyes. It was pitch dark in his room. Thus, he saw nothing but a few outlines.  
He felt something heavy on his stomach that he could not assign. Hence, he had trouble getting up. He reached out curiously and wanted to classify it. What he felt was hair. A human! Was it Akiteru? No, the hair was too protruding for that. Akiteru had short, straight hair.

Everything was still spinning in Tsukishima's head, and he could hardly think clearly. So, he reached for the switch on his bedside lamp to light up the room a little. He just had to know who this stranger was in his room and who had fallen asleep with his head on his stomach.

When the light lit up the room, his breath was almost gone. He quickly shook his head and rubbed his eyes. There were only two options for this situation. Either that was just a dream... or he had hallucinations from the fever and the many medications he had taken.

"Tsukki", the figure muttered, slowly starting to sit up. He stretched and yawned loudly. Then he looked at the blonde and smiled. "You woke up, Tsukki." The voice was still very sleepy.  
"Kuroo? Is that really you? Isn't this... a dream?" Tsukishima was visibly confused and reached for the face of the figure. It felt real. No hallucination? No dream?  
The black-haired man had to laugh. "No, it's not a dream. It's really me."

Tsukishima still had no words for this situation. He straightened up so that he was sitting on his bed, making room for Kuroo to sit next to him. "Why... why are you here? What time is it, even?"  
"At some point when we were on the phone, you just suddenly didn't answer anymore. Then I heard a loud bang, and you no longer responded to me calling your name. I was worried and got on the next train to Sendai as soon as possible. Well, and... now I'm here with you."

"But... what about school? The training? Bokuto?"

"Please, let's not talk about Bokuto", Kuroo sighed, shaking his head slightly. "Today is Friday anyway, so I only miss one day at school. I can afford that since my grades are actually pretty good. As for training, my boys will forgive me if I miss it one time." He scratched the back of his head, embarrassed, and laughed. The next moment he got serious again and looked deep into the blond's eyes as he grabbed his face and held it. He wanted to make sure Tsukishima couldn't avoid his eyes.

"What you said earlier on the phone hurt me, you know. It really hurt me. That's why I wanted to see you as soon as possible. As if I would take Bokuto as a replacement for you, stupid. Bokuto is an idiot. He is my best friend, and we spend a lot of time together, but… there is nothing more about it, I swear. I only love you, and there is no substitute for you."  
He interrupted his speech with a gentle kiss on Tsukishima's lips.

"You are very important to me, and that's why I don't want you to just leave me like that. If you really don't love me anymore and don't want to have anything to do with me anymore, then..."  
This time he was interrupted by a kiss from Tsukishima. His eyes widened in surprise. He really hadn't expected that. The blonde leaned his forehead against Kuroo's.

"I love you, Kuroo. I love you so much that I am completely confused. I'm not used to this kind of feeling. This strange rage when we are on the phone, and I hear Bokuto in the background. That warm feeling when you're with me and kissing me. It's all so strange to me, and I just haven't gotten used to it yet. And it drives me crazy that I constantly drive myself crazy because we hardly see each other, which hardly seems to bother you."- "Me, not caring? That's absolutely not true... every night when I go to bed, I think of you and how much I would like to have you in my arms. It's just that I don't want to burden you with my feelings. We can't see each other every day. And even every weekend doesn't work because we both have training. So, if I told you every day how much I miss you and how much I wish you were with me, it would only be a burden for you. That's why I rarely say anything like that."

A weak laugh escaped Tsukishima. "Does that mean I made myself mad for nothing?" Kuroo also had to laugh. "Seems so."

The rest of the night, they both lay arm in arm in bed and kissed while talking about trivial things. They spoke for an eternity until they finally fell asleep cuddled together. Both looked satisfied and happy.

"I love you, Tsukki."

"I love you too, Kuroo."


End file.
